Finn

Yes, Dear…

by Anjie Coates
Photo by Anjie Coates

inn is a Miniature Pinscher who has a reputation for biting everyone and anyone when he doesn’t get his way. However, his owners are rather shocked that he’s so compliant for most of his groom…
“Hi, Finn. You ready for a spa day?” I ask.
Finn gives me the side-eye and sighs as I scoop him off the floor, take his harness off and hand it to his Dad.
“Aww c’mon, buddy, it’s not so bad. You need a bath, and you need those nails trimmed. Sometimes I wonder if you’re growing them into weapons, they grow so fast each month.” I say.
Finn: “Yeah, well I am. So you better watch it.”
“Are you done being a grouch? Can we skip to the good-boy part now please?” I ask.
Finn: “I guess so. You’re kind of annoying though, you know.”
“Oh, I know. But you need grooming,” I tell him.
Finn: “Yeah, well, one of these days I’m going to bite you.”
“No, you’re not, buddy. Because just before you get there, you win the Amazomatic Bitestopper 1,000!” I tell him as I point to the basket muzzle that is always on hand for when he gets that look in his eye and chooses violence.
Finn scoffs but he knows I’m serious, because we’ve had to use it before.
“In all these years, and all these grooms, have I ever hurt you?” I ask.

Finn: “Yes…You hurt my feelings!”
“What? How?” I exclaim.
Finn: “You know I bite, but you aren’t afraid. I’m big, tough and strong, and you don’t even notice!
“Oh, now that’s where you’re wrong, buddy. I notice. I’m not afraid of you though. I don’t do anything to cause you any pain, frighten you, or…well, OK…maybe the nail trimming is annoying, but it doesn’t hurt.” I say.
Finn: “It is annoying. You’re not going to buy me off with treats or head rubs either. I know your tricks and I’m not falling for it.”
“OK, good to know. Can you turn? I need to get your other side.” I ask.
Finn dutifully turns, forgetting he’s supposed to be defiant.
“OK, let’s get you dried up, shall we?” I ask.
Finn: “Yeah, warm towel. It’s about time!”
I lift him out of the tub and carry him to my table. I call out for my assistant, Angie, as we walk down the hall.

Angie walks in and grabs a Finn-sized muzzle as I take out the rotary tool.
Finn: “I see what you’re doing. I’m not letting you. I’m not.”

“Relax, buddy. Take a deep breath and this will all be over super-fast,” I say.

Angie begins rubbing under his ears and his eyes glaze over in happiness.

I quickly get his nails done, and on the last toenail of the last foot, the realization he’s been tricked again occurs.
Finn: “Oh no, you didn’t!”
“There, you made it through another nail trim.” I say.
Finn is about to protest, but he realizes the time for it has passed as I’m brushing him out, which he loves.
Finn: “Good thing you finished when you did. I’d have bitten you for sure.”
“Uh huh. I know. We’re almost done, buddy. After this, we’ll get your picture taken,” I tell him.
Finn: “Any good costumes?”
“I think you’ll find one you like,” I say.
Finn: “We’ll see…”
I finish him up and carry him to the picture room where I offer him a choice between two costumes. He snorts at the Wolfman costume and chooses the other.
Finn: “So, how does it look?”
“I think your mom would call it oddly fitting,” I say.
Finn smiles for the camera.
“You did really well today and I’m sorry if your feelings were hurt. I actually care about you, you know? I want you to be happy,” I tell him.
Finn: “I know. I kinda like you too. Don’t tell anyone though, it’ll ruin my reputation. OK?”
And I reply,